Tag Archives: Best Christmas Horror Films

Top 10 Asshole Santas from Film and TV.

Ho Ho Fucking Ho, Merry Shitmas (is what any of these uncouth vagabonds would likely say)

tommy

The jolly fat man and all round good samaritan, Santa Claus, has been the icon of goodwill (and Coca-Cola) for generations of children (and soda junkies). Personally I love Santa and won’t have a bad word said about him. However to every yin there is an inevitable yang. So here’s a look at Deadly Movies’ Top 10 Santa A-holes, the type of guys who come in through your downstairs window or shit down your chimney.., Continue reading
Advertisements
Tagged , , , , , ,

12 DAYS O̶F̶ TO CHRISTMAS: DAY 8

Great Christmas Moments: Day 8: James Caan gets forked by Bill Goldberg in ‘Santa’s Slay’ (2005)

Such is the nature of horror movies and horror movie production that you get to see some wonderfully random moments in pop culture. One of the activities on my Bucket List was to see James Caan get his hands nailed to a table with dinner forks by former WWE and WCW legend Bill Goldberg. Step forward 2005’s ‘Santa’s Slay‘, officially the only movie in history where Bill Goldberg dressed in a Santa suit stabs a mustachioed James Caan’s hands with mamma’s finest silver wear. Every Christmas eve I slick back my hair, stick on a pencil ‘tache, leave two shiny forks between my bed, and settle in for a good nights sleep, waiting and hoping for Bill ‘santa’ Goldberg to appear in my bedroom and permanently fix my palms to the bedside table. Ah Christmas.

Tagged

12 Days ̶o̶f̶ to Christmas: Day 3

12 Great Christmas Moments | Day 3: Alan Arkin sings atop the roof in Edward Scissorhands (1990)

It would be all too easy to single out the beautiful scene from Edward Scissorhands where Johnny Depp and Winona Ryder share a moment of bliss below the falling frozen flakes of Edward’s ice carving. BUT, watching the great Alan Arkin singing I Saw Three Ships (Come Sailing In) while stapling fake snow to the roof of his suburban home is sheer cinema joy. Not only is this another great example of Burton’s on-going commentary of ‘fake’ suburbia throughout the movie, It’s just fantastic watching the ever loveable Arkin being oblivious to the turmoils and drama going on beneath him.

Tagged , ,

12 Days ̶o̶f̶ to Christmas: Day 2

12 Great Christmas Moments | Day 2: Jack Frost takes a shower with Shannon Elizabeth in ‘Jack Frost’ (1997)

Jack Frost is a great movie for many, many reasons. Principally because It’s about a killer snowman, which is just a great subversion of one of Christmas’s most wholesome traditions. There are many wonderfully stupid moments one could highlight from the movie, but for Deadly Movie’s second day of our Christmas countdown lets celebrate the wonderment that is seeing a killer snowman fondle (a 24 year old) Shannon Elizabeth in the shower. Shannon was a mere two years away for global fame for her jaw-dropping turn as Nadia in American Pie, so retrospectively watching this particular scene is great fun.

Tagged , ,

Top 5 Asshole Santas (Redux, 2011 version)

Ho Ho Fucking Ho, Merry Shitmas (is what any of these uncouth vagabonds would likely say)

The jolly fat man and all round good samaritan, Santa Claus, has been the icon of goodwill (and Coca-Cola) for generations of children (and Coke junkies). Personally I love Santa and won’t have a bad word said about him. However to every yin there is an inevitable yang. So here’s a look at Deadly Movies’ Top 5 Santa A-holes, the type of guys who come in through your downstairs window rather than your chimney.
I
Tagged , , , ,

TOP 10 DEADLY MOVIES CHRISTMAS MOMENTS: 6 DAYS TO GO

6 Days To Go | Mrs Deagle goes into orbit in ‘Gremlins’ (1984)

The Deagle hasn't landed

Nothing warms your Christmas turkey giblets quite like propelling an old woman out of a top floor window. At least that’s what movies teach me each Holiday season. Like her pilgram fathers Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin, Mrs Deagle pushes the frontiers of human propulsion by launching her frail old body out and into the evening sky by means of Gremlin tampered stair-lift. Blazing a trail for Astro Physics and Aeronautic Engineering, we salute you Mrs Deagle.

Tagged , , , , , , ,

Top 10 Deadly Movies Christmas Moments: 7 Days to Go

7 Days To Go | Bill Goldberg decapitates nativity Jesus in ‘Santa’s Slay’ (2005)

Behind you Jebus!

Former WCW champ Bill Goldberg is on surprisingly good form as Santa in Santa’s Slay, serving up all manner of festive feasts including child decapitation, spearing James Caan, and setting fire to a woman’s head. All good stuff. But for Deadly Movies the highlight has to be the imagery of Santa decapitating Jesus. Ok admittedly it’s a statue Jesus, but I can’t think of another movie where this happens, and for that I salute you evil wrestler Santa.

Oh come let us behead hiiiiiiim, Chriiist the Lord

Tagged , , , , ,
%d bloggers like this: