Great Moustaches and Beards in Horror History 1979: Robert Foxworth in Prophecy

Robert Foxworth Prophecy

Dr Rob (Foxworth) is on the hunt for environmental pollutants which he fears are causing mutations on a grand scale amongst the animals of Maine. Look deep into those greys, browns, and blondes within that beard tapestry. What are the filmmakers trying to tell us? Clearly the grey is the wisdom of years at University, job and tax dodging. The brown is the masculinity to wrestle a mutated bear-pig in the wilds of New England. The blonde is the kind of sexual man musk that makes women’s panties slip themselves off. Tie all of that into a crop of blonde head curls that Adonis himself would sweep-up off the barber-shop floor to glue unto his undeserving scalp. Dr Rob; smarter than you, stronger than you, and having sex with your wife and sister right now. All because of a three tone Neapolitan beard that today is a designated campus in its own right with an all female faculty and student body numbering 50,000. Majors at The University of Dr Rob’s Beard (or UDRB) include Beach Volleyball, Locker-room Leg Oiling, and Woodland Promiscuity.

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